Failure Save Us

September 4, 2019


Failure saves us from our worst selves. Imagine and shudder if we were to enjoy nothing but success. We could have become arrogant, reckless, insufferable.

 

But failure is a gift. A painful gift but necessary nonetheless if we are to grow our innate nobility.

 

Consider the fine line between being fun and being frivolous. When I say “fun”, I mean being cheery even though there are reasons to be morose, playful without being childish, and considerate of others. But when the “fun” is carried to the extreme, one can become superficial, irresponsible, with nary a care for others.

 

Failure saves such a fun person from being frivolous. How? The pain of falling on our faces gives us a measure of wisdom and sensitivity. It weans us from shallow pursuits and spurs us to pursue what is truly important in life. What I consider as most important, it expands our heart to feel someone else’s pain.

 

Failure involves loss: the loss of innocence, the loss of a dream, the loss of an idealized self. And loss invites grief.

 

By all means, we give ourselves permission to grieve, but let us do so while treading the path of gratitude. As we release the regrets of yesterday, we can rejoice over the opportunities of today.

 

Photo by Andrew Le on Unsplash

0 Comments

Had the first man not given up too soon, he would be rich beyond his wildest dreams.

 

A man was strolling through his land and found a nugget of gold on the ground. Excitedly, he grabbed a shovel and began digging around. He dug dozens of pits. He dug wide and he dug deep. But instead of more gold, he only uncovered more dirt.

 

Fatigued and disgusted, he sold his hole-ridden property to someone else.

 

The new owner took a closer look at one of the holes. Out of curiosity, he dug a few inches further down and discovered what turned out to be a rich vein of gold. Had the first man not given up too soon, he would be rich beyond his wildest dreams.

 

Too often we struggle with problems and pressures and, like that disgusted owner, we give up. But we may miss out the “gold” that comes with sticking it out.

 

I am not saying that there are no circumstances under which we quit. I am saying that we think carefully before we do. Don’t sacrifice what may be a good place right now in favor of the temporary relief of surrender.

 

​If today you want to raise the white flag, don’t. Hang in there.
Persevere. Keep the faith. You’ll be glad you did.

Photo by Allef Vinicius on Unsplash

0 Comments

It is impossible to lead a perfect life. But it is never too late to lead an excellent one.

 

I remember hitching a ride with a friend and he accidentally bumped his car against a post. As he drove on, this time with a pronounced bump on his fender, he muttered “I’m so ashamed of myself.”

 

Why are some people quick to forgive others but they just can’t forgive themselves? The root cause is that we are clinging to an idealized image of ourselves. In the case of my friend, he wanted to be a flawless driver, with nary a scratch on the paint job. When his car “kissed” that post, it wasn’t just the fender which suffered a dent that day.

 

Are you still wincing over a bum decision you made ages ago?

 

Perhaps the perfectionist image you are harboring (and you may not even know it) is one where you are so smart that you will always make the right choices. Then when the opposite happened, that image taunts you “How can you be so stupid? You should have known better!”

 

And you, poor you, moan “Yeah, yeah! Guilty!”

 

So what’s the solution? Loosen up on that perfectionism. Instead, pursue excellence.

 

Let us admit that we will inevitably do something that we will later wish we didn’t. Then, armed with lessons from the past, we will make wiser decisions and do more of the right deeds. It is impossible to lead a perfect life. But it is never too late to lead an excellent one.

 

In fact, it is never too late for a friend to become a careful yet happy driver.

 

Photo by Handy Wicaksonoon Unsplash

We’d love for you to leave a comment and share this post to encourage others. Thank you.

0 Comments

Looking for a specific
topic? Search below,

Generic selectors
Exact matches only
Search in title
Search in content
Post Type Selectors