Second, accept who you are not.
John added, “You yourselves can testify that I said, ‘I am not the Christ…” (3:28).
Now remember the Jews were chafing under the authority of the Romans. Thus, they were longing for the promised Messiah, whom they interpreted as a political savior. So when some firebrand popped up, the people would wonder, “Is this the Christ we have been waiting for?”
Not surprisingly, when multitudes flocked to John the Baptist – with his bold rhetoric and austere lifestyle – even the Jewish religious leaders quizzed him if he was that Christ. I would imagine how John would be tempted to say yes. Or at least give a sly nod. After all, why not? Why can’t he start the movement? Why can’t he get something out of his troubles?
Had John went down that path and the real Christ enters the stage, that would trigger the alarm bells of envy. But he resisted the press releases about him. He showed incredible level-headedness when he avowed, “I am not the Christ.” That’s why when, later, Jesus stole the spotlight from him, there was nothing within John to be threatened.
Part of overcoming envy is to be at peace with who you are not. I am not the celebrity author; I am not the highly paid hotshot. Definitely, I am not the center of my universe.
Notice I said, “be at peace with who you are not.” Envious people know that they are not the people they envy. They have no choice but to live with the reality. But it takes great courage to face the “what is not” and let go of the resentment. We reject the notion that the Fates have conspired against us, cheating us from what is justly ours.
But we have Someone far better. We are not under the machinations of Fate, but under the wise care of the Father. And in letting go of who we are not, we free ourselves to blossom into who we really are.
This brings us to the third lesson. Don’t miss it.
Photo credit from Forbes
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First, acknowledge where your blessings come from.
John told his disciples, “A man can receive only what is given him from heaven” (John 3:27).
He knew that the crowds that flocked to him were not his in the first place. Rather, God had entrusted these people to him. If He wanted to transfer these people into the care of His Son, that was fine with John. In fact, the Baptist did not harbor any illusion that he was entitled to anything at all. He held what he had been given with an open hand.
I need to remember that everything comes from God. True, we work hard and smart. But our intelligence, skills, education, health, employment, success, even the ability to work comes from Him.
The mega-rich like Bill Gates or Donald Trump may think that they got their big bucks from their savvy. But even their ability to produce wealth is from God (Deuteronomy 8:17-18).
This leads to a corollary: It is God’s prerogative on how much wealth, fame or privilege will go to each person.
When I realized this, I have chosen to stop comparing myself with others. Remember that person half my age but earns double my salary? If God chooses to bless him that way, I really have no ground to gripe.
Photo credit from getlevelhead.com
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I feel it whenever I would read about someone half my age earning twice my salary. Or meet a famous author whose books sold millions worldwide.
I feel it. Envy. The green-eyed monster.
In wishing I were this high-earner or that author, I was, in effect, telling God that He was holding out on me. Why did He bless that guy and not me?
Envy is a heart issue. I began to unlock the vise grip of envy as I read how John the Baptist responded to a similar situation.
Let’s begin with John at the height of his popularity. “The whole Judean countryside and all the people of Jerusalem went out to him” (Mark 1:5). Make no mistake; the Baptist was a crowd-drawer. He was preaching to and baptizing multitudes.
Then Jesus entered the scene. In the Gospels, we read how John baptized Jesus and proclaimed Him to be “the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!” Immediately, John lost at least two of his disciples to Jesus.
Later, Jesus’ popularity grew so that more and more people were going to Him. We can sense the alarm in John’s disciples when they told him, ““Rabbi, that man who was with you on the other side of the Jordan – the one you testified about – well, he is baptizing, and everyone is going to him.” Or to paraphrase: “Hey, Johnny. He’s stealing our business. We gotta do something!”
Had John been a lesser man, he would have regarded Jesus as a threat, encroaching into his territory and poaching his followers. He could have gotten angry, insecure, jealous or depressed. He could have worried that, in due time, he would be reduced into a religious has-been.
But the Baptist’s response had an amazing absence of resentment or envy. In fact, John was even rejoicing. I discovered four lessons to counter the envy that gnawed at my soul, which I will share in the next posts. Stay tuned!
Photo credit from saga.co.uk
I have a pet name: Boxer. Not because I punch the lights out of people, but because I am tight-fisted. Kuripot. A miser. A Scrooge. A Chinese Ilocano Jew (with apologies to these ethnic groups).
One time, my wife Lucy and I had excess cash. She suggested we give it as a love gift to a pastor. I balked, “What for? We may need it one day.”
I was not at peace for the rest of that day. Then I remembered how Abraham was blessed. Abraham waited 25 years for his son Isaac to be born. Then God told Abraham, “Take your son, your only son, Isaac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about.” (Genesis 22:2).
I don’t know about you, but I would shoot back, “Are you kidding, Lord?” The same “what for?” tone I gave Lucy.
Incredibly, early the next morning, Abraham set out with Isaac towards Moriah. No excuses. No delays. The journey took three days, plenty of time for Abraham to change his mind. But his obedience was unwavering and absolute. Upon arriving at the site, Abraham built a wooden altar, laid Isaac on it, and took the knife to slaughter his son.
Make no mistake, he was going to do it! Not, “Well, Lord, ummm… here I am, about to slit Isaac’s throat … If You really don’t want me to do it, now’s the time to say so… You really don’t want this, huh, Lord? … I’m still waiting, Lord….”
At the precise moment when Abraham was about to kill Isaac, an angel of God stopped him. The angel said, “I swear by myself, declares the LORD, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore” (Genesis 22:17).
Do you see how we can be blessed? It starts with obeying God’s call to surrender all that takes first place before Him, i.e. our Isaacs. Then God will not only bless us, He will use us to bless the people around us.
Isaac symbolizes whatever is most near and dear to our hearts. Perhaps Abraham had grown fonder of Isaac than of God. For me, my Isaac was a comfortable life. That means money.
God wants me to be free from the love of money and be content with what I have. Thus, oftentimes God corrects me by giving me opportunities to give, to offer, to sacrifice. He is training me to rest my security on Him, not on a fat bank account.
Later, Lucy brought up the issue again. This time, I said, “Yes. Give.” Thus, we gave that love gift to that pastor.
When we release our Isaacs, God releases blessing.
Photo credit: David Brooke Martin, Unsplash
My darling wife Lucy and I are hardly super-spiritual people. We still have our share of spats. Yet if I am asked for the secret of our marriage (18 years this coming April!), I would say “megadoses of grace.”
Why do many relationships break down? One major reason is unresolved hurts. The husband utters a cutting remark to the wife. The wife shoots a barbed comment at the husband. The result is internal friction that wears down the relationship. Left unaddressed, the hurt festers and poisons the relationship. In worst cases, the relationship disintegrates into a mess of bitterness and loathing.
A relationship is like a car engine. It needs lubrication. I had a friend who used to be a prosperous businessman. His car was a fancy Volvo. Then he fell into hard times. He still drove the Volvo to get around, but, being financially tight, he skimped on the oil changes. The time came that the engine oil got so dirty that it damaged the pistons. His car, now useless, sits rusting in his garage.
Grace is the lubricant of relationships. Great grace makes for great relationships. It works like this: “You hurt me, but I choose not to hurt you back. Rather, I choose to give you a blessing you do not deserve.” This doesn’t mean that we condone the wrong or evade the issue. It doesn’t excuse domestic violence. But one can still exercise grace which seeks the redemption of the offender.
Yet the chronic dilemma persists. “How can I ever forgive her? What she did was so hurtful!” Where is the justice, you may ask? Well, it’s all taken cared of at the Cross. Jesus paid for that sin, that hurt. And yes, He paid for our sins, too, which would have cast us into a wretched eternity.
As we realize the enormous grace which God has shown us, we find it easier to extend grace to the wrongdoer. Yes, especially in marriage. The popular song “love will keep us together” needs some tweaking. The better adage would be “Grace will keep us together.” Megadoses of it!
Does your relationship need an oil change? You will know it when you feel something grinding between the two of you. By all means, talk it over. But weld the power of grace.
Photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez, Unsplash
People commend me for being so productive in my writing, speaking, and social media, even while running two factories. I could mumble something like vision or time management.
But the answer is simple: I’m old and dying.
Don’t worry. I don’t mean wrinkly, wizened old. And not wasting-away, wheelchair-bound dying. I mean: I am not getting any younger. In due time, I will kick the bucket, buy the farm, push up daisies, join the choir invisible, pop one’s clogs, ride the pale horse, take a dirt nap, enter into Glory. You get the idea.
Statistically, the average Filipino male has 67 years to live. For the average Filipino female, it’s 75 years. Go figure. This means that, in theory, I have nine more years before I am “no more”. That’s not even a decade!
There are two extreme reactions to impending mortality.
The first is cynicism. George Bernard Shaw once quipped that youth is wasted on the young.
But I adhere to the Christian paradigm. Tim Keller once said something like this: Heaven is a place where you can do all the good things you want to do on earth, but can’t.
Think about it. In our respective rooms at the Father’s mansion, the musician will still be composing arias, the artist will still be chiseling marble, the author will still be welding the pen.
But there will no longer be griping about lack of time. In fact, will time still exist in eternity?
The words “potential” and “struggling” will be banished from our vocabulary; our skills and talents will find their fullest expression. Each output will be more splendid than the last.
Each masterpiece will attest to God’s unbridled radiance.
But meantime, I am here.
There’s a lot to wisdom to imbibe and to impart. Lots of experiences to pursue and to process, both real and virtual, the peaks as well as the valleys, the heartwarming and the heartbreaking.
Lots of old friends to greet, lots of new friends to meet.
I guess I am striving to make my deathbed as regret-free as possible. Blame it on Steven Covey’s funeral exercise, Randy Pausch’s Last Lecture, or Nelson Dy’s Final Interview.
Thus, I live, love, laugh, maybe lament a bit. I scribble, speak, share.
So heck, yah. I will call this post: Gratitude journal: Life
Sometimes I wonder why do people greet each other “Happy New Year”? Was the old year anything but happy?
I have observed that we think of New Year’s Day as the perfect date to “reboot” ourselves. We promise – this time, this year – to lose weight, to spend more time with family, to learn a new skill, and so on.
Then as we pack up the holiday décor and dive back to the daily grind, our resolutions on January 1 devolve into best intentions by January 15. We lose heart and wait for the next New Year’s Day to make those same resolutions!
But it doesn’t have to be that way. You may have heard of the quote “Today is the first day of the rest of your life.” Well, this means every day is New Year’s Day! It kicks off the next 365 days of your earthly existence. Really.
That means we can wake up each morning with the same giddiness and optimism as if it were New Year’s Day. Here’s how.
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- Don’t have a resolution. Have a goal with numbers and timetables.
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- Now break down that goal into specific action items that will eventually fulfill that goal.
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- Plug those action items into your calendar where you can regularly see them.
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- Prioritize those action items in your daily to-do list. That’s your New Year’s Day – everyday!
- Keep doing it 365 times and your new year will be definitely better than the last one.
And remember: “Because of the LORD’s great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never end. They are new every morning, great is [His] faithfulness” (Lamentations 2:22-23).
Blessed New Year, everyone!
Photo by Daniella Maccines, Unsplash
After I ordered something online, I clicked Submit and waited for what I felt to be an unusually long time.
A dialogue box then announced that my time opted out and asked me to press a Reset icon. I complied and went through the ordering process again, which succeeded the second time.
In my calendar, January 1 is my Reset button. I had my share of things I wanted to do last year but didn’t get around to it. Meantime, new opportunities are looming for my career and personal development.
Got any emotional baggage? If you were miserable last year, don’t you think it is foolish to remain miserable for one more year? Now is the time to make peace with God, with others and (I dare say) with yourself.
Got any unfulfilled longings? Instead of moping, envying and griping, let us find ways to realize them as much as possible. For example, you yearn to be promoted at work or get a pay raise. Instead of blaming office politics or the economy, ask yourself, “What are the small steps I must do to merit an increase in responsibilities?”
Got any cherished aspirations? This period can be a breathing space: to breathe new vitality and vividness to our ambitions. Now is the time to dream big dreams and be bold and unfettered in our pursuits this year.
Are you poised to make this year your best ever? Get rid of the glitches, reset and launch forth!
We’d love for you to leave a comment and share this post to encourage others. Thank you.
February 7, 2021
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