You may have heard of this strategy: when you want to extract information from someone, play dumb. That will make the other person feel so superior to you that he will flaunt his superiority by telling you more than what he would otherwise do.
But here’s my concern. If you keep playing dumb, people may think you ARE dumb. And that will backfire on your personal branding.
Sure, I will concede there will be times when it will be wiser to act dumb. For example, the other person is “teaching” you something that you know is wrong. But you don’t want to correct him lest you may make him feel like a fool or you come across as a know-it-all.
That is why if you must play dumb, do it sparingly. You don’t want a boss to say “No, I won’t promote Nelson. I have to keep spoon-feeding him. He’s dumb.”
What’s more, what if you play dumb to people and they somehow realize it’s all an act? Then you will be seen as manipulative and therefore, untrustworthy.
So what can you do? It is to play the student. You don’t have to put on a goofy mask to say “I’m curious. What is the…?” I tried it on people and I have never been put down. In fact, most folks delight being a mentor or instructor for a while.
And if the other person DOES put you down (“Four years of engineering school and you don’t know?”), well, that’s their attitude problem. But when you get to know what they know, guess who will have the last laugh?
So in general, don’t play dumb. Play smart by being genuinely inquisitive. If you are groping to understand something (or someone), that does not necessarily mean a basement IQ. Rather, it speaks of a hungry intellect and a humble spirit.
And people will admire you for it… if they’re not dumb.
#playdumb #dumb #conversation #learning #careercoach #careerstrategy #intelligence
December 5, 2022
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